Losing My Motivation
My tooth broke, I have to go to the dentist tomorrow. The girl who was helping me on the phone transfered me to someone who was less than stupid. Before that all happened I had wrapped up all the presents and thought we’d get them under the tree. Then I started to lose my motivation.
I turned on the tv and saw a live snippet of the Sean Taylor funeral. I’m going to be honest with you when I tell you that other than he played for the Redskins and went to THE U I don’t know anything about the man. He may or may not have had an ordinary lifestyle that fit his age, and some people may not have liked him. What I know is that I hear he has matured since the birth of his daughter and at least had the chance to become a man that she’ll be proud to call her dad some day.
I also know that I started to cry my eyes out when I saw that little girl who is not even two, and will have little actual memory of her father when she gets older. She was kinda bobbling around like most 18 month olds do and everyone clapped, she clapped excitedly. She had no clue that they were clapping because someone was eulogizing her father.
How sad is that? Now I’m completely unmotivated. I started to think about how Sydney was that age when she came to live with us, younger when her father died. She doesn’t know him, she never will, and she spent very little time with him when he was alive. There are about 3 photos, and I have them in my possession.
At any rate my daughter will tell you she was a baby so she had to get a new daddy. She needed taken care of and she got a new daddy, and he’s her best daddy. She came up with that on her own after asking Kevin why he didn’t get a new daddy when his died. Not all kids get new daddy’s and that’s what makes me so sad.
I think I’ll cry in my ice cream now.
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Just thank the good Lord above that there are people like you and your husband that are willing to give a child a wonderful, loving and stable home.