Hurts So Bad
I’m fairly deaf in the left ear at this point. Of course all this happened on Friday. The pain was so bad on Thursday night and Friday morning that I just though oh, earache. Then it went away. I thought the hearing would come back fairly quickly. It didn’t. It got worse.
What else is worse is that my head, the entire left side is pounding with pain. Yesterday I made an appointment with an ENT that I had seen before. I go Thursday morning at 8 something. Today while crying and feeling a little out of it I tried calling every other ENT that I could find. The soonest I can get in is on June 6th. That’s pathetic.
In my life I’ve had major sinus and allergy problems and this is the worst of them by far. I sort of want to blame my doctor for this. Remember how I went in for blinding headaches and I was really stressed out and instead of attributing them to stress he said my birth control was a known cause of these headaches and I should stop taking them if the anxiety medicine did not help them? It didn’t help them. I stopped taking it.
Remember I went in for the pain my breast and I did indeed have a virus and he said that my ear was impressive but it’s a virus so nothing can be done about it? He gave me a 6 day supply of celebrex that I took all of and now, a couple weeks later the same old same old sinus pressure. But this time it built up. This time I feel like I’m packed full of stuff, my temple feels like it’s going to explode and if crying didn’t hurt that’s all I would do.
Actually, sitting up at the computer silent is the least hurtful position. Sleeping even hurts. I contemplated going to the ER today, but I backed down. They just would probably tell me to see the ENT specialist. I can tell you that if the ENT doesn’t have an exact answer for me even if it is as simple as wow you have a really bad sinus problem, I’m going to go nuts.
This is not something I can live with. It’s unlivable. I will drive myself to Indianapolis and go to the emergency room at IU Medical Center or Methodist Hospital and if they admit me so be it. When I recline back, it’s hard to breathe. I can’t even talk to Sydney to tell her things or even raise my voice at her to let her know she’s not getting away with something without a blinding sharp pain behind my eye.
I was totally against surgery until today. If they say they want to break my perfect little nose and fix me, so be it. When I was a little girl I was almost completely deaf and then I had sinus back up so bad that my left eye swelled up and drained. They of course sent me home from school, yet nobody ever bothered to fix me. What the hell why do I have to be broken?
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